me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Randomize
