oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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