so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
