Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I need to wash the frat house off of me
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
