It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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