Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
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