im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
