made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize