I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
