Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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