her vagine was all disorganized.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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