Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
