My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize