It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
