That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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