The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Randomize
