brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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