I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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