Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
