How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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