I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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