what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize