the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
