You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
