I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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