You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
