is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize