talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
