Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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