So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
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