why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Dicks are not precious.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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