do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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