I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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