Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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