Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
