that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
