So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize