Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Randomize
