You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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