I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
tell me about the fingering
Randomize