3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
