So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
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Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
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He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
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