how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize