so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
