He asked to "fluff my boner.."
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
