I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Randomize
