No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
