I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
