I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
