Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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