I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
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