I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
