is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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